My girl's are olympians in teen 'tude

If eye rolling was a sport, my girl's would be gold medalists.
I am the lucky( stop chuckling) mother of two teen girls, who have perfected the art of teen attitude. I don't know what or why it happens, just some cosmic joke or biological tick, but as soon as puberty hits, teens are endowed with certain "super 'tude" powers.

Parents of pre-teens, look for the following signs.....

1. The Eye Roll... the big eyes rolling to the back off the head gesture and is usually accompanied by the phrases "whatever" or "that's so lame"
This can be done while stomping away, standing still or with the optional sigh attachment, depending on the level of perceived parental lameness.

2. The Sigh...not a normal sigh,this is a hissing like a komodo dragon sigh and is usually coupled with the eye roll. Teens truly fluent in sighing do this while rolling eyes, with hands on hips, while drawing out the sigh for at least 3 beats with jaws lolling wide open in disbelief that they parent can be so mean. Parents, if you see this combo, you have a pro on your hands!

3. The Flounce...an over the top, stomping of the foot with a turn and then a dramatic walking away while muttering under the breath. Really good flouncers will also add the phrase "fine!" said with tears in their eyes, a sassy hair flip or a venomous look over their shoulder as they exit.

4. The Mutter...also know as mumbling. Most answers to parental questions, will be followed by some form of this. It's always under the breath just a bit to low and slurred to be made out, but with just enough attitude so that you respond with " what was that?" or "I know you're not talking to me!"
Really champion mumblers will get you so bent with their tone, that they will be sent straight to their room even if parents are unsure if what was just mumbled was even in English.
If you have seen your child display any or all of the following signs, congratulations, you are now the parents of a teenager!

I have personally witnessed my daughters with a group of their friends,and all of them simultaneously displaying the above signs. It was like a scene out of children of the corn. Parents, my only advice if you see such a gathering is back away slowly while offering midol and ice cream or do what I do and carry a pocket taser.

That's my daily rant...
D